A Mermaid's New Nails

You know, for someone who’s supposed to be the smartest one out of the entire cast, she sure kinda forgot that… nail polish spreads across water and doesn't stay still. That is, unless it’s completely dried, but I’m not exactly sure how long a mermaid can withstand the sun until their gills collapse. Considering that most kinds of standard nail polish take about a good hour or two to dry, I don’t think she’ll last long when the colorized coating hardens. But hey, at least her skeleton will look pretty when studied in The State Museum of Pennsylvania. Wait, are their tails like fish scales and it’s not actually their bones? Oops.

 The Unwelcoming Cruise

Most crews aboard a cruise ship typically would try and hold their tongue when handling rowdy and uncooperative passengers, especially if said passengers are affecting the safety of others. Keep in mind, you’re not in a theme park or a hotel where you can easily be kicked out and have to drive back home. You’re stuck in the middle of the freezing dangerous waters of the ocean, with the only thing holding you in are the handlebars looped around the top deck of the vessel. If anything were to happen with your tickets when riding aboard the cruise, most of the time, you'd be asked to either pay right up or leave, typically before the cruise had left the arms of the dock.

So… how on god’s green earth did Tom and Betty get themselves stuck in a situation like this? Who really knows. Bad luck probably. The only kind of cruises where passengers would be forced to walk the plank are those Barbados-based pirate-themed cruise lines that have a surprisingly large number of good scores on Tripadvisor. But you gotta admit, the crew’s pirate outfits are a perfect 10/10… even if they’re most likely REAL cutthroat buccaneers. Betty’s kind of fancy, but not really what she wanted on a relaxing vacation with her boyfriend.

 A Little Push for a Quick Dive

As the final weeks of the warm season come approaching, everyone tries to scratch off their final itch to go swimming. Now, of course, a good amount of people (usually either more careless mid-teenagers or insane people; you know exactly who I’m talking about) prefer to spice up their water aerobics session by skipping the left turn where the beach is and to make a sharp right turn over to… the nearest cliff.

Completely isolated, unsupervised, without a single eye in sight. Though, there are the occasional small school of fish swimming around the bends of the sharp rocks that's poking out of the blankets of water. There’s also the rare flock of birds, refilling their free subscription of Liveleak as they get a crisp clean view of the next new idiot who decides it’s a good idea to bungee jump something that couldn’t be more of a death zone even if it wasn’t trying to (Mother Nature forms her earth the way she decides, though it could be argued she makes a game out of it and does her spells blindfolded). Or even worse and more often the case, the victim of intense peer-pressureing by the group of Fair-weathered “friends”. Sure, they’re chant for the kid to dive right in, but there ain’t no way from Hell and back they're gonna pay for the huge hospital bill after all of the surgeries.

Of course, Tom isn’t that type of guy. He just likes to have fun… while not fully knowing the outcome of what’s about to come. Betty knows Tom like a book and loves him to death, but even she can agree Tom can be the handful sometimes. Tom doesn't have to worry about any hospital bills, but he may have to worry about Betty beating his ass when she climbs back up the cliff. A perfect life-lesson lol.